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Being bullied can seriously affect a child's
physical and mental health. This can include:
- feeling sad and lonely
- lacking confidence and feeling bad about themselves
- becoming depressed
- complaining of various physical symptoms e.g. headaches,
stomach aches
- worrying and trying to avoid going to school
These problems can carry on long after the
bullying has stopped.
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Parents
Be open to the possibility that your child might be being
bullied. Some parents may not think of bullying as a possible
reason for their child's distress.
Listen - One of the most important things you
can do is to listen to your child if they say they are being
bullied. It can be very difficult for them to talk to anyone about
it.
Take your child seriously - Many
children suffer in silence for a long time before they tell anyone.
They may be ashamed, embarrassed, and may believe that they deserve
it. Many children are frightened of telling because they fear the
bullies will find out and hurt them even more. It can take great
courage to tell an adult.
Do not blame the child - Being bullied is not
their fault (although they may think it is). Reassure them that
they were right to tell you.
Do not promise to keep the bullying a secret
- Something must be done about it. Reassure your
child that you, and the teachers, will make sure that things do not
get worse because they have told you. Tell the school so they can
stop it. Teachers don't always know that a child is being bullied.
Find out if there is an anti-bullying programme in the
school.
Talk with your child and work out ways of solving the
problem - Include your child in decisions about how to
tackle the problem. For example, work out some practical ways for
them to stop the bullying. You might discuss what they should say
back if they are called names, or where it's safe to go at
playtime.
School
Bullying happens in every school, so it is important that each
school has an effective anti-bullying programme. Good intentions
are not enough. Both pupils and staff need to act when they see a
child being bullied. Every school can obtain an anti-bullying pack
from the Department for Education and Skills. There are a number of
agencies that can offer advice and help in how to set up effective
programmes (see above sources of further information).
Other professionals who can
help
Children whose health has been affected may
benefit from some specialist help from their general practitioner,
school nurse, a social worker or an educational psychologist who
will be able to offer help and advice. Children with emotional
problems quite often need these to be treated directly, even if the
school has managed to stop the bullying. Your general practitioner
can refer your child to a child and adolescent mental health
service (CAMHS).
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