Kate, 16, talks about her abuse

 

"It started when I was about 8 and my and I sister went to stay with my aunt and uncle. My sister, aunt and cousins went out, but I didn’t feel well so I stayed behind. My uncle said he had a game that would make me feel better. He said it was a special game that we could play with my cousin’s Barbie doll. In the game, Barbie got married and then went on her Honeymoon – he said on a Honeymoon people do special things and he could show me what they were, but I mustn’t tell anyone because I’d get into serious trouble.

 

He took Barbie’s clothes off and I don’t really remember what he did next. He said he could show me how to play this game, that it would make him happy. It’s really hard to talk about what happened next. Then he made me promise I wouldn’t tell anyone, he said people wouldn’t understand and would get angry with me. Then he gave me some sweets. After that, whenever I went to visit something would happen.

 

In the beginning he was quite nice to me and although I didn’t want it to happen, I didn’t want to upset him. I’d pretend it wasn’t happening.

 

Then I began to get scared of him, he’d get angry. It got harder to pretend it wasn’t happening and I thought about it a lot, I felt really sad. My mum asked if anything was wrong but I couldn’t tell her – he said she would be angry with me and that anyway no one would believe me. I felt so upset and scared and trapped – I couldn’t tell anyone and couldn’t stop it.

 

I started to cut myself. I told my friend at school, she said she’d seen a programme when a girl rang Childline. She helped me find the number and let me use her mum’s phone.

 

They talked to me, that made me feel better. My friend told her mum, she told my mum. Mum was really upset but not angry – she said she was sad it had happened. That it wasn’t my fault. She spoke to the police. A policewoman and social worker came to see me, they were really nice. They asked me to tell them what had happened – it took me a long time. It wasn’t like on The Bill or anything, it was in a really ordinary room, not in a police station. They arrested my uncle.

 

We don’t see my aunt now or my cousins because they are upset that mum spoke to the police. Mum says its better that we did, that it’s better it stopped and that we’re safe. I feel a lot better now."

 

For help, contact Childline: 0800 1111.

© 2011 Royal College of Psychiatrists