Mental Health and Growing Up
Factsheet
The restless and excitable child: for parents, carers and
anyone who works with young people
About this factsheet
This is one in a series of factsheets for
parents, teachers and young people entitled Mental Health and
Growing Up. The aims of these factsheets are to provide
practical, up-to-date information about mental health problems
(emotional, behavioural and psychiatric disorders) that can affect
children and young people. This factsheet looks at the reasons
behind why some children are more restless and excitable than
others, gives advice about how to deal with an overactive child,
and suggests where to go to get extra help if you feel you are
unable to cope on your own.
Introduction
Young children are often restless and
excitable. Their noisy liveliness is usually just a part of being
young. Although it may be tiring, it is usually nothing to worry
about.
Sometimes youngsters may be so active and
noisy that it makes life difficult for their parents and other
children. A child like this may be demanding and excitable, and
chatter away nineteen to the dozen. They may be noisy, may not do
as they are told, and will probably find it difficult to sit still.
Adults may say that he's ‘hyperactive’, but the trouble with this
word is that professionals use it to describe extreme and sometimes
dangerous behaviour, such as running out into a busy road.
What makes children overactive?
There are many things that can make a child
overactive. The following should give you some guidance as to the
reasons for your child's behaviour. Finding the reasons may help
you to come up with some solutions to deal with them.
If parents are unhappy, depressed or worried,
they tend to pay less attention to their children. They may find
they can't spend the time they need to help them play
constructively, or they may find that when they do play with them,
they spend a lot of time telling them to be quiet. Children learn
from this that they have to be naughty or noisy to get any
attention from their mum or dad.
It is important to have simple rules about
what is allowed and what is not. If two parents are involved, they
both need to agree about the rules, and be consistent and fair when
they say ‘no’. This will help the child to know what is expected
and to learn self-control (see our Factsheets on good parenting and
on behavioural and conduct problems).
We are all born with different temperaments.
Some children are livelier, noisier and more outgoing than others.
They may prefer going out and being with other people than quietly
reading a book or playing with toys by themselves. Quite often,
children who are active like this are also excitable and may go
over the top while playing. Although this can be a nuisance, it is
nothing to worry about, but you may need some help in finding ways
to help your child calm down.
- Learning and other
problems
Some children find it hard to learn things
that other children find easy. They may need special help at
school. They may seem quite young for their age and find it hard to
concentrate on work or control their behaviour as well as other
children.
Some children may be affected by
attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD). If this is the
case, seek help.
Glue ear (ear infections) is a common example
of a hearing problem. If a child has glue ear, they will find it
hard to hear what other people say, will tend to shout and may want
the television turned up very loudly.
Some children do seem to react to certain
foods by becoming restless and irritable. This is not as common as
some people think, but occasionally it can be a real problem.
How can I get my child to calm down?
Try to make sure you spend time with your
child on their own, so that they know you are interested in them.
This will give you the chance to plan and
praise.
Take every opportunity to
praise your child. Be as clear as possible. It is
vital that they understand exactly what they have done to please
you. For example, “you've been playing so quietly on your own …
what a good boy you are” or “what a good footballer you are”.
Spend time with your children doing something
they enjoy. Get into a routine and plan what they
are going to be doing for the day or the weekend. It is helpful to
arrange to have friends to come and play, (encouraging their social
development) and gives you a break when they are invited back! It
is also helpful to engage them in regular activities such as
football or trampoline sessions, cubs, brownies etc. because this
gives you a chance to meet other parents, who can provide an
informal support network. You can also make clear times when you
expect them to play quietly on their own.
Where can I get help?
Lively, excitable behaviour is a common
problem for parents. Your health visitor will be used to giving
advice about this. If there seems to be a problem with your child's
hearing, or if there seems to be a reaction to foods, your general
practitioner should be able to help and refer to a specialist if
required. If they think that there might be a learning difficulty
or a hyperactivity disorder, they will refer you to a clinical
psychologist, paediatrician or Child and Adolescent Mental Health
Services (CAMHS) (see our factsheet on CAMHS).
Further information
Family Lives
Parentline offers help and advice to parents
bringing up children and teenagers. Helpline 0808 800 2222.
Positive Parenting
Organisation has a useful website offering
training, resources and literature.
Further reading
Stallard P. Parenting Pre-School
Children, How to Books is a useful and practical
book.
Webster Stratton, C. (1992): The
Incredible Years: A Troubleshooting Guide for Parents of Children
Aged 3_8. London: Umbrella Press.
References
The Young Mind: an essential guide to mental health for young
adults, parents and teachers. Edited by Bailey, S. and Shooter,
M. (2009)
Rutter, M. & Taylor, E. (eds) (2008)
'Rutter’s Child and Adolescent Psychiatry' (5th edn).
London: Blackwell Publishing.
- Revised by the Royal College of
Psychiatrists’ Child and Family Public Education Editorial
Board.
- Series Editor: Dr Vasu Balaguru
- With grateful thanks to Dr Kate Gingell.
This leaflet reflects the best possible evidence at the time of
writing.
© March 2012. Due for review March 2014. Royal
College of Psychiatrists. This leaflet may be downloaded, printed
out, photocopied and distributed free of charge as long as the
Royal College of Psychiatrists is properly credited and no profit
is gained from its use. Permission to reproduce it in any other way
must be obtained from the Head
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Please note that we are unable to offer advice on individual cases. Please see our FAQ for advice on getting help.
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