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  • Become a psychiatrist

    Become a psychiatrist

    • Choose Psychiatry

      Choose Psychiatry

      • What is psychiatry?
      • How to become a psychiatrist
      • Why choose psychiatry?
      • What next?
      • On a break from training?
      • Help support our campaign
      • Choose Psychiatry – Guidance for Medical Schools
      • 'Make this a better world'
      • Continue to choose psychiatry
    • Sixth formers and school students
    • Medical students

      Medical students

      • Becoming a student associate
      • Psychiatry attachments
      • Awards, prizes and bursaries for medical students
      • PsychSocs
      • National Student Psychiatry Conference
      • Summer and autumn schools
      • FuturePsych – the student associate magazine
      • The Student Psychiatry Audit and Research Collaborative (SPARC)
    • Foundation doctors

      Foundation doctors

      • Foundation doctor associates
      • Making the most of your psychiatry placement
      • Opportunities for foundation doctors
      • FuturePsych - the associate magazine
      • Applying to Core and Higher Training
      • Careers in mental health research
    • Help us promote psychiatry

      Help us promote psychiatry

      • How can I help?
      • Ideas to inspire you
      • Resources to help you promote psychiatry
      • RCPsych Recruitment Strategy 2022-2027
    • Supporting Medical Students: Medical Schools
    • Choose Psychiatry
      • What is psychiatry?
      • How to become a psychiatrist
      • Why choose psychiatry?
      • What next?
      • On a break from training?
      • Help support our campaign
      • Choose Psychiatry – Guidance for Medical Schools
      • 'Make this a better world'
      • Continue to choose psychiatry
    • Sixth formers and school students
    • Medical students
      • Becoming a student associate
      • Psychiatry attachments
      • Awards, prizes and bursaries for medical students
      • PsychSocs
      • National Student Psychiatry Conference
      • Summer and autumn schools
      • FuturePsych – the student associate magazine
      • The Student Psychiatry Audit and Research Collaborative (SPARC)
    • Foundation doctors
      • Foundation doctor associates
      • Making the most of your psychiatry placement
      • Opportunities for foundation doctors
      • FuturePsych - the associate magazine
      • Applying to Core and Higher Training
      • Careers in mental health research
    • Help us promote psychiatry
      • How can I help?
      • Ideas to inspire you
      • Resources to help you promote psychiatry
      • RCPsych Recruitment Strategy 2022-2027
    • Supporting Medical Students: Medical Schools
  • Training

    Training

    • Exams

      Exams

      • Can I take an exam?
      • Contact the Exams team
      • Preparing for exams
      • Applying for your exam
      • Exam results
      • Special notices
      • A fair exam
      • Examiners and exam panels recruitment
      • FAQs about applying for exams
      • FAQs about preparing for exams
      • FAQs about the day of the exam
      • FAQs about assessment and results
      • Exams news and updates
      • Exams Reading List
      • FAQs about our exam centre in Doha
    • Curricula and guidance

      Curricula and guidance

      • 2022 Curricula Implementation Hub
      • 2014 GMC approved curricula (ending July 2024)
      • Specialty training guides
      • Dual training
      • Assessment Strategy Review
    • Portfolio Online
    • Your training

      Your training

      • Psychiatric Resident Doctors' Committee: supporting you
      • Routes to Registration
      • Applying for training
      • Run-through training
      • Training less than full time
      • Time out of training
      • Academic Training
      • Understanding Career Choices in Psychiatry
      • Leadership and Management Fellow Scheme
      • Prizes and bursaries for trainees
      • Cost of Training
      • Industrial action FAQs
      • Distribution of medical training posts
      • Presenting evidence at mental health tribunals
    • Medical training initiative (MTI)
    • International Medical Graduates
    • Employer Hub
    • Undergraduate education forum
    • Quality Assurance in Training
    • Credentialing
    • CPD eLearning
    • Dean's Quarterly Updates

      Dean's Quarterly Updates

      • Dean's Quarterly Update - April 2025
      • Dean's Quarterly Update - January 2025
      • Dean's Quarterly Update - September 2024
      • Dean's Quarterly Update - June 2024
      • Dean's Quarterly Update - February 2024
      • Dean's Quarterly Update - October 2023
      • Dean's Quarterly Update - June 2023
      • Dean's Quarterly Update - March 2023
      • Dean's update - 2022
    • Building Capacity in Perinatal Psychiatry

      Building Capacity in Perinatal Psychiatry

      • Perinatal Psychiatry Masterclass Series
      • About the Building Capacity Project
    • RCPsych Learn
    • Exams
      • Can I take an exam?
      • Contact the Exams team
      • Preparing for exams
      • Applying for your exam
      • Exam results
      • Special notices
      • A fair exam
      • Examiners and exam panels recruitment
      • FAQs about applying for exams
      • FAQs about preparing for exams
      • FAQs about the day of the exam
      • FAQs about assessment and results
      • Exams news and updates
      • Exams Reading List
      • FAQs about our exam centre in Doha
    • Curricula and guidance
      • 2022 Curricula Implementation Hub
      • 2014 GMC approved curricula (ending July 2024)
      • Specialty training guides
      • Dual training
      • Assessment Strategy Review
    • Portfolio Online
    • Your training
      • Psychiatric Resident Doctors' Committee: supporting you
      • Routes to Registration
      • Applying for training
      • Run-through training
      • Training less than full time
      • Time out of training
      • Academic Training
      • Understanding Career Choices in Psychiatry
      • Leadership and Management Fellow Scheme
      • Prizes and bursaries for trainees
      • Cost of Training
      • Industrial action FAQs
      • Distribution of medical training posts
      • Presenting evidence at mental health tribunals
    • Medical training initiative (MTI)
    • International Medical Graduates
    • Employer Hub
    • Undergraduate education forum
    • Quality Assurance in Training
    • Credentialing
    • CPD eLearning
    • Dean's Quarterly Updates
      • Dean's Quarterly Update - April 2025
      • Dean's Quarterly Update - January 2025
      • Dean's Quarterly Update - September 2024
      • Dean's Quarterly Update - June 2024
      • Dean's Quarterly Update - February 2024
      • Dean's Quarterly Update - October 2023
      • Dean's Quarterly Update - June 2023
      • Dean's Quarterly Update - March 2023
      • Dean's update - 2022
    • Building Capacity in Perinatal Psychiatry
      • Perinatal Psychiatry Masterclass Series
      • About the Building Capacity Project
    • RCPsych Learn
  • Members

    Members

    • Membership

      Membership

      • Members login
      • Receipts
      • Pay Your Subscription
      • Direct Debit
      • Your subscription
      • Grades of membership
      • Benefits of membership
      • Fellowship and other Honours
      • Applying for Fellowship
      • Nominations for Honorary Fellows
      • Nominations for National Honours
    • Submitting your CPD
    • Workforce Wellbeing Hub

      Workforce Wellbeing Hub

      • Psychiatrists' Support Service (PSS)
      • How the College supports workforce wellbeing
      • Top 10 tips for wellbeing
      • Coaching and mentoring
      • If a patient dies by suicide
      • If a patient commits homicide
      • Support for Refugee Psychiatrists
    • Supporting your professional development

      Supporting your professional development

      • New consultants (StartWell)
      • Revalidation
      • Assessing and managing risk of patients causing harm
      • Leadership and management
      • Working less than full time
      • Writing clinic letters
      • If a patient dies by suicide
    • CPD eLearning
    • Your faculties

      Your faculties

      • Faculty of Academic Psychiatry
      • Faculty of Addictions Psychiatry
      • Faculty of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry
      • Faculty of Eating Disorders Psychiatry
      • Faculty of Forensic Psychiatry
      • Faculty of General Adult Psychiatry
      • Faculty of the Psychiatry of Intellectual Disability
      • Faculty of Liaison Psychiatry
      • Faculty of Medical Psychotherapy
      • Faculty of Neuropsychiatry
      • Faculty of Old Age Psychiatry
      • Faculty of Perinatal Psychiatry
      • Faculty of Rehabilitation and Social Psychiatry
      • Faculty job descriptions
    • Specialty and Specialist Doctors

      Specialty and Specialist Doctors

      • A message from the Chair
      • Who are SAS doctors?
      • How to enter the SAS grade
      • SAS career development
      • SAS doctors resources
      • College SAS training and events
      • Startwell and Staywell
      • SAS Strategy
    • Devolved Nations

      Devolved Nations

      • RCPsych in Scotland
      • RCPsych in Wales
      • CBSeic Cymru
      • RCPsych in Northern Ireland
      • Executive Committee job descriptions
    • English Divisions

      English Divisions

      • Eastern Division
      • London Division
      • Northern and Yorkshire Division
      • North West Division
      • South Eastern Division
      • South West Division
      • Trent Division
      • West Midlands Division
      • Executive Committee job descriptions
      • All Division events
    • International members
    • Special Interest Groups

      Special Interest Groups

      • How to join a Special Interest Group (SIG)
      • Adolescent Forensic Psychiatry Special Interest Group (AFPSIG)
      • Arts Psychiatry Special Interest Group (ArtSIG)
      • Digital Psychiatry Special Interest Group (DPSIG)
      • Evolutionary Psychiatry Special Interest Group (EPSIG)
      • History of Psychiatry Special Interest Group (HoPSIG)
      • Neurodevelopmental Psychiatry Special Interest Group (NDPSIG)
      • Occupational Psychiatry Special Interest Group (OPSIG)
      • Philosophy Special Interest Group 
      • Private and Independent Practice Special Interest Group (PIPSIG)
      • Rainbow Special Interest Group
      • Spirituality and Psychiatry Special Interest Group (SPSIG)
      • Sport and Exercise Psychiatry Special Interest Group (SEPSIG)
      • Transcultural psychiatry Special Interest Group (TSIG)
      • Volunteering and International Psychiatry Special Interest Group (VIPSIG)
      • Women and Mental Health Special Interest Group (WMHSIG)
      • Annual SIG Newsletters
    • Public members list
    • RCPsych Insight magazine

      RCPsych Insight magazine

      • RCPsych Insight Cover Art Exhibition
    • Publications and books
    • Members' eNewsletters
    • Posts for members
    • Jobs board
    • Committees of Council
    • President's lectures

      President's lectures

      • Declaration of competing interests (President's lectures)
      • List of president's lectures competing interests
      • Past President's lectures
    • Retired members
    • eLearning Hub
    • Obituaries

      Obituaries

      • Submit an obituary
      • Remembering Dame Fiona Caldicott
    • Mindmasters quiz

      Mindmasters quiz

      • Attend Mindmasters 2025
      • Who won in 2024?
      • The rules of the quiz
      • Sample quiz questions 
    • RCPsych ceremonies

      RCPsych ceremonies

      • New Members Ceremonies
      • Fellowship ceremonies
      • Specialist Registration Ceremonies
    • Question Time with the Officers
    • 2024 membership feedback
    • Speciality and Sub-Speciality (SAC/SSAC) Advisory Committees
    • Membership
      • Members login
      • Receipts
      • Pay Your Subscription
      • Direct Debit
      • Your subscription
      • Grades of membership
      • Benefits of membership
      • Fellowship and other Honours
      • Applying for Fellowship
      • Nominations for Honorary Fellows
      • Nominations for National Honours
    • Submitting your CPD
    • Workforce Wellbeing Hub
      • Psychiatrists' Support Service (PSS)
      • How the College supports workforce wellbeing
      • Top 10 tips for wellbeing
      • Coaching and mentoring
      • If a patient dies by suicide
      • If a patient commits homicide
      • Support for Refugee Psychiatrists
    • Supporting your professional development
      • New consultants (StartWell)
      • Revalidation
      • Assessing and managing risk of patients causing harm
      • Leadership and management
      • Working less than full time
      • Writing clinic letters
      • If a patient dies by suicide
    • CPD eLearning
    • Your faculties
      • Faculty of Academic Psychiatry
      • Faculty of Addictions Psychiatry
      • Faculty of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry
      • Faculty of Eating Disorders Psychiatry
      • Faculty of Forensic Psychiatry
      • Faculty of General Adult Psychiatry
      • Faculty of the Psychiatry of Intellectual Disability
      • Faculty of Liaison Psychiatry
      • Faculty of Medical Psychotherapy
      • Faculty of Neuropsychiatry
      • Faculty of Old Age Psychiatry
      • Faculty of Perinatal Psychiatry
      • Faculty of Rehabilitation and Social Psychiatry
      • Faculty job descriptions
    • Specialty and Specialist Doctors
      • A message from the Chair
      • Who are SAS doctors?
      • How to enter the SAS grade
      • SAS career development
      • SAS doctors resources
      • College SAS training and events
      • Startwell and Staywell
      • SAS Strategy
    • Devolved Nations
      • RCPsych in Scotland
      • RCPsych in Wales
      • CBSeic Cymru
      • RCPsych in Northern Ireland
      • Executive Committee job descriptions
    • English Divisions
      • Eastern Division
      • London Division
      • Northern and Yorkshire Division
      • North West Division
      • South Eastern Division
      • South West Division
      • Trent Division
      • West Midlands Division
      • Executive Committee job descriptions
      • All Division events
    • International members
    • Special Interest Groups
      • How to join a Special Interest Group (SIG)
      • Adolescent Forensic Psychiatry Special Interest Group (AFPSIG)
      • Arts Psychiatry Special Interest Group (ArtSIG)
      • Digital Psychiatry Special Interest Group (DPSIG)
      • Evolutionary Psychiatry Special Interest Group (EPSIG)
      • History of Psychiatry Special Interest Group (HoPSIG)
      • Neurodevelopmental Psychiatry Special Interest Group (NDPSIG)
      • Occupational Psychiatry Special Interest Group (OPSIG)
      • Philosophy Special Interest Group 
      • Private and Independent Practice Special Interest Group (PIPSIG)
      • Rainbow Special Interest Group
      • Spirituality and Psychiatry Special Interest Group (SPSIG)
      • Sport and Exercise Psychiatry Special Interest Group (SEPSIG)
      • Transcultural psychiatry Special Interest Group (TSIG)
      • Volunteering and International Psychiatry Special Interest Group (VIPSIG)
      • Women and Mental Health Special Interest Group (WMHSIG)
      • Annual SIG Newsletters
    • Public members list
    • RCPsych Insight magazine
      • RCPsych Insight Cover Art Exhibition
    • Publications and books
    • Members' eNewsletters
    • Posts for members
    • Jobs board
    • Committees of Council
    • President's lectures
      • Declaration of competing interests (President's lectures)
      • List of president's lectures competing interests
      • Past President's lectures
    • Retired members
    • eLearning Hub
    • Obituaries
      • Submit an obituary
      • Remembering Dame Fiona Caldicott
    • Mindmasters quiz
      • Attend Mindmasters 2025
      • Who won in 2024?
      • The rules of the quiz
      • Sample quiz questions 
    • RCPsych ceremonies
      • New Members Ceremonies
      • Fellowship ceremonies
      • Specialist Registration Ceremonies
    • Question Time with the Officers
    • 2024 membership feedback
    • Speciality and Sub-Speciality (SAC/SSAC) Advisory Committees
  • Events

    Events

    • Conferences and training events

      Conferences and training events

      • Register your interest - CESR in Psychiatry Training
      • MHA Section 12 and Approved Clinician Training
      • Subscribe to receive the Events eNews
      • RCPsych Certification Courses
      • Grand Rounds
      • Old Age Faculty Trainees
    • International Congress 2025

      International Congress 2025

      • Exhibition opportunities 2025
      • Poster Presentations 2025
      • Your guide to Congress
      • Registration
      • Programme
    • In-house training

      In-house training

      • Competing interests
    • Free webinars
    • Claiming expenses

      Claiming expenses

      • What can I claim
    • Terms and conditions for event booking
    • Speaker guidance for online events
    • EventsAir FAQs
    • Speaker guidance for in-person events
    • Conferences and training events
      • Register your interest - CESR in Psychiatry Training
      • MHA Section 12 and Approved Clinician Training
      • Subscribe to receive the Events eNews
      • RCPsych Certification Courses
      • Grand Rounds
      • Old Age Faculty Trainees
    • International Congress 2025
      • Exhibition opportunities 2025
      • Poster Presentations 2025
      • Your guide to Congress
      • Registration
      • Programme
    • In-house training
      • Competing interests
    • Free webinars
    • Claiming expenses
      • What can I claim
    • Terms and conditions for event booking
    • Speaker guidance for online events
    • EventsAir FAQs
    • Speaker guidance for in-person events
  • Improving care

    Improving care

    • College Centre for Quality Improvement (CCQI)

      College Centre for Quality Improvement (CCQI)

      • What we do in the CCQI
      • Quality Networks and Accreditation
      • National Clinical Audits
      • Multi-source feedback
      • CCQI resources
      • CCQI - who we are
      • CCQI research and evaluation
      • Health of Nation Outcome Scales (HoNOS)
    • Campaigning for better mental health policy

      Campaigning for better mental health policy

      • College Reports
      • Position Statements
      • Integrated care and mental health
      • Children and young people's mental health Green Paper
      • Cross-government mental health and wellbeing plan 
      • RCPsych in Parliament
      • Processes for producing College publications, consultations, surveys and endorsements
      • Other policy areas
      • Mental Health Watch
      • Reforming The Mental Health Act
      • The Mental Health Policy Group (MHPG)
      • Preventing mental illness: Our manifesto for the next UK general election
      • The 2024 General Election and our manifesto
      • Assisted dying/assisted suicide
    • Planning the psychiatric workforce

      Planning the psychiatric workforce

      • About our workforce unit
      • Job planning and recruitment
      • Our workforce census
      • Campaigning for the mental health workforce of the future
      • Workforce strategy
      • Job description approval process
    • Public Mental Health Implementation Centre

      Public Mental Health Implementation Centre

      • Partnerships and events  
      • How to work with the Public Mental Health Implementation Centre
      • About the PMHIC
      • PMHIC Aims and objectives
      • Reports
      • About public mental health
      • PMHIC Parliamentary Launch 
      • PMHIC Commercial Determinants of Mental Health (CDoMH) Symposium 
      • PMHIC Parliamentary Roundtable 
      • Smoking and Mental Health in Wales 
      • Public Mental Health Learning Community 
      • Weight management and mental health: A framework for action in Wales
    • National Collaborating Centre for Mental Health (NCCMH)

      National Collaborating Centre for Mental Health (NCCMH)

      • About NCCMH and our work
      • Clinical guideline development
      • Competence frameworks
      • Quality improvement programmes
      • Reviews, evaluations and reports
      • Service design and development
      • Work with us
      • Culture of Care Programme
      • A–Z of NCCMH publications
      • Compassionate and Relational Care Learning Programme
      • Compassionate and Relational Care Learning Programme - Events
      • Compassionate and Relational Care Learning Programme - Who's involved?
    • Act Against Racism

      Act Against Racism

      • Tackling racism in the workplace
      • Adopt the guidance and join our network
      • Act Against Racism: a toolkit to support the campaign
      • If you're experiencing racism at work
      • Allies: information and signposting
      • FAQs about the campaign
      • Act Against Racism campaign films
      • Resources
    • Sustainability and mental health

      Sustainability and mental health

      • Why is sustainability important?
      • Sustainability in your community
      • Sustainability in your practice
      • Sustainability in your trust
      • Sustainability at RCPsych
      • Nature matters
      • Sustainability scholars
      • Sustainability resources
      • College position on sustainability
      • RCPsych at COP26
    • Public Health and its role in mental heath
    • Using quality improvement
    • Net Zero Mental Health Care Guidance and Education

      Net Zero Mental Health Care Guidance and Education

      • Net Zero Mental Health Care Report Launch Event
    • Mental Health Awareness Week
    • Invited Review Service
    • Physician Associate Review

      Physician Associate Review

      • Physician Associate Review Meeting Summaries
    • College Centre for Quality Improvement (CCQI)
      • What we do in the CCQI
      • Quality Networks and Accreditation
      • National Clinical Audits
      • Multi-source feedback
      • CCQI resources
      • CCQI - who we are
      • CCQI research and evaluation
      • Health of Nation Outcome Scales (HoNOS)
    • Campaigning for better mental health policy
      • College Reports
      • Position Statements
      • Integrated care and mental health
      • Children and young people's mental health Green Paper
      • Cross-government mental health and wellbeing plan 
      • RCPsych in Parliament
      • Processes for producing College publications, consultations, surveys and endorsements
      • Other policy areas
      • Mental Health Watch
      • Reforming The Mental Health Act
      • The Mental Health Policy Group (MHPG)
      • Preventing mental illness: Our manifesto for the next UK general election
      • The 2024 General Election and our manifesto
      • Assisted dying/assisted suicide
    • Planning the psychiatric workforce
      • About our workforce unit
      • Job planning and recruitment
      • Our workforce census
      • Campaigning for the mental health workforce of the future
      • Workforce strategy
      • Job description approval process
    • Public Mental Health Implementation Centre
      • Partnerships and events  
      • How to work with the Public Mental Health Implementation Centre
      • About the PMHIC
      • PMHIC Aims and objectives
      • Reports
      • About public mental health
      • PMHIC Parliamentary Launch 
      • PMHIC Commercial Determinants of Mental Health (CDoMH) Symposium 
      • PMHIC Parliamentary Roundtable 
      • Smoking and Mental Health in Wales 
      • Public Mental Health Learning Community 
      • Weight management and mental health: A framework for action in Wales
    • National Collaborating Centre for Mental Health (NCCMH)
      • About NCCMH and our work
      • Clinical guideline development
      • Competence frameworks
      • Quality improvement programmes
      • Reviews, evaluations and reports
      • Service design and development
      • Work with us
      • Culture of Care Programme
      • A–Z of NCCMH publications
      • Compassionate and Relational Care Learning Programme
      • Compassionate and Relational Care Learning Programme - Events
      • Compassionate and Relational Care Learning Programme - Who's involved?
    • Act Against Racism
      • Tackling racism in the workplace
      • Adopt the guidance and join our network
      • Act Against Racism: a toolkit to support the campaign
      • If you're experiencing racism at work
      • Allies: information and signposting
      • FAQs about the campaign
      • Act Against Racism campaign films
      • Resources
    • Sustainability and mental health
      • Why is sustainability important?
      • Sustainability in your community
      • Sustainability in your practice
      • Sustainability in your trust
      • Sustainability at RCPsych
      • Nature matters
      • Sustainability scholars
      • Sustainability resources
      • College position on sustainability
      • RCPsych at COP26
    • Public Health and its role in mental heath
    • Using quality improvement
    • Net Zero Mental Health Care Guidance and Education
      • Net Zero Mental Health Care Report Launch Event
    • Mental Health Awareness Week
    • Invited Review Service
    • Physician Associate Review
      • Physician Associate Review Meeting Summaries
  • Mental health

    Mental health

    • Mental illnesses and mental health problems

      Mental illnesses and mental health problems

      • ADHD in adults
      • Alcohol, mental health and the brain
      • Anorexia and bulimia
      • Anxiety and generalised anxiety disorder (GAD)
      • Autism and mental health
      • Avoidant/restrictive food intake disorder (ARFID)
      • Bereavement
      • Bipolar disorder
      • Cannabis and mental health
      • Catatonia
      • Cocaine dependence
      • Coping after a traumatic event
      • Debt and mental health
      • Delirium
      • Depression
      • Depression in older adults
      • Feeling overwhelmed
      • Gambling disorder
      • Heroin dependence
      • Hoarding
      • Intellectual disabilities
      • Medically unexplained symptoms
      • Memory problems and dementia
      • Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD)
      • Perinatal OCD
      • Perinatal OCD for carers
      • Personality disorder
      • Physical illness and mental health
      • Postnatal depression
      • Postnatal depression key facts
      • Postnatal depression for carers
      • Postpartum psychosis
      • Postpartum psychosis for carers
      • Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) 
      • Schizoaffective disorder
      • Schizophrenia
      • Seasonal affective disorder (SAD)
      • Self-harm
      • Shyness and social phobia
      • Sleeping well
    • Support, care and treatment

      Support, care and treatment

      • Alzheimers drug treatments
      • Antidepressants
      • Antipsychotics
      • Antipsychotics in pregnancy
      • Being sectioned (in England and Wales)
      • Benefits, financial support and debt advice
      • Benzodiazepines
      • Caring for someone with a mental illness
      • Children's social services and safeguarding
      • Cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT)
      • Complementary and alternative medicines: herbal remedies
      • Complementary and alternative medicines: physical treatments
      • Long-acting injectable (depot) antipsychotics
      • Deprivation of Liberty Safeguards
      • Electroconvulsive therapy (ECT)
      • Hypnosis and hypnotherapy
      • Liaison psychiatry services
      • Lithium in pregnancy and breastfeeding
      • Mental capacity and the law
      • Mental health in pregnancy
      • Mental health rehabilitation services
      • Mental health services and teams in the community
      • Mental Health Tribunals
      • Mother and baby units (MBUs)
      • Neuromodulation
      • What are perinatal mental health services?
      • Planning a pregnancy
      • Psychotherapies and psychological treatments
      • Social prescribing
      • Spirituality and mental health
      • Stopping antidepressants
      • What to expect of your psychiatrist in the UK
      • COVID-19: for patients and carers
      • Veterans' mental health
    • Young people's mental health

      Young people's mental health

      • Bipolar disorder for young people
      • Cannabis and mental health for young people
      • Club drugs for young people
      • Cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) for young people
      • Coping with stress for young people
      • Depression in children and young people
      • Drugs and alcohol for young people
      • Eco distress for young people
      • Physical activity, exercise and mental health for young people
      • OCD for young people
      • Psychosis for young people
      • Schizophrenia for young people
      • When a parent has a mental illness
      • When bad things happen for young people
      • Who is who in CAMHS?
      • Anxiety for young people
      • Weight, exercise and eating disorders for young people
      • Preparing for a blood test or vaccine for young people
      • Use of digital media for young people
    • Translations of our mental health information

      Translations of our mental health information

      • Arabic عربى
      • Bengali বাঙালি
      • Chinese 中文
      • French Français
      • German Deutsch
      • Greek Ελληνική
      • Gujarati ગુજરાતી
      • Hindi हिंदीहिंदी
      • Italian Italiano
      • Japanese 日本語
      • Marathi मराठी
      • Persian (Farsi) فارسی
      • Polish Polski
      • Portuguese (Brazil) Português (Brasil)
      • Punjabi (Pakistan) پنجابی
      • Romanian Română
      • Russian Pусский
      • Sindhi سنڌي
      • Spanish Español
      • Swahili Kiswahili
      • Tamil தமிழ்
      • Telugu తెలుగు
      • Ukrainian украї́нська
      • Urdu اردو
      • Vietnamese Việt
      • Welsh Cymraeg
      • התמודדות לאחר אירוע טראומטי Coping after a traumatic event in Hebrew
      • Mijûlbûna piştî bûyerekê trawmatîk Coping after a traumatic event in Kurdish
      • Travmatik bir olayla başa çıkma Coping after a traumatic event in Turkish
      • စိတ်ထိခိုက်ဖွယ် ဖြစ်ရပ်တစ်ခုကို ရင်ဆိုင်ဖြေရှင်းခြင်း Coping after a traumatic event in Burmese
    • Order mental health leaflets and resources

      Order mental health leaflets and resources

      • Order mental health packs for schools
    • About our mental health information
    • Mental health information disclaimer
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Guest post: Being Diagnosed with BPD

Scotland blog

24 May, 2021

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As part of Borderline Personality DIsorder (BPD) Awareness Month, we are giving our blog space to Alison, who has written as part of the #BPDAndMe campaign. The campaign was co-created with individuals with Borderline Personality Disorder, the Mental Health Improvement team at NHS GGC, the BPD Pathway Steering Group, and the Mental Health Network. 

Everyone’s experience of receiving this diagnosis will be different. For some it will come in what could still be termed formative years; for others it could come after decades of struggling and confusion. For some it might feel like the end of the world; for others it may be a relief. Others might really not know how they feel about it.

The crucial thing to hold on to is that there is no right or wrong response. You feel the way you feel and your feelings are as valid as anyone else’s. You’re allowed to be relieved, sad, scared, angry, confused. To feel any or all of those things. Or even what seems like nothing at all.

Maybe the diagnosis of a personality disorder left you feeling as though you in your most basic form, your most fundamental “you-ness” are flawed and somehow wrong. That there’s some irrevocable fault in your make-up. Something that can never be changed. Because surely if your personality is supposedly disordered, you’re broken at your very core. You might feel like it’s your fault you are the way you are. Like you deserve all the hurt and distress you experience. Because you’re the one whose personality is fractured, inherently wrong. And if you read some of the stuff online it might make you feel like you’re a lost cause, beyond fixing.

That’s not true.

I repeat: that’s not true. None of it.

All your complex feelings are valid. All of them. Even the ones that tell you it’s your fault. If you feel it, it’s valid. But that doesn’t mean it’s true. Please believe me that’s it’s not your fault. And hopefully in time you will gradually come to recognise that.

It’s taken me a while. I’m still working on it.

I don’t know how or when you received your diagnosis or how long it took. I do know you’ll have been through a hell of a lot before you did.

For me, getting the diagnosis confirmed was a long process. I had suffered from anorexia from the age of 16, which reached its lowest point in 1998 at the age of 21 when I saw a mental health professional for the first time and was put on antidepressants. After graduating from university the following year, I moved to Berlin in 2000, where I had a period of being mostly well (or what I thought was well) until another mental health crash happened. I spent 8 weeks as a day patient in a psychiatric clinic, followed by 13 weeks on an inpatient programme for eating disorders.

When the programme ended, the discharge letter listed among the other diagnoses something termed 'Emotionally Unstable Personality'. I didn’t understand what that meant; I don’t recall it ever being mentioned during therapy. To be honest, I didn’t even realise it was an official diagnosis. I thought it just meant I was a bit oversensitive and flaky. I never thought to look it up. That was in 2003 when I was 26.

The intervening years had been marked by extended periods of managing to work but with recurrent crashes back into depression that saw me off work for increasingly lengthy periods. Seeing a psychologist, being tried on various medications, always being told it was depression, with anxiety added to the mix at some point.

That recurrent cycle of increasingly severe crashes had haunted me ever since my time in Berlin. And every crash eroded my confidence more and more. I started feeling like it had to be more than 'just' depression and anxiety. It didn’t explain the rapid mood swings and bursts of explosive anger triggered by the slightest thing.

Why could I feel okay and then a few minutes or an hour later be in floods of tears? Why did I so often feel so uncontrollable, so suddenly and intensely distressed? Why did I feel so much without knowing why? Why did I have such meteoric mood swings that could cycle so rapidly in just one day? Why did I feel such boiling, visceral distress that I couldn’t do anything but take it out on myself in the form of self-harm?

I felt guilty I couldn’t “get over” depression and anxiety even with medication, and after so many years. I felt like I was a failure. I was desperate to understand because I couldn’t live like this any more. I even started to wonder if it was bipolar II, but that didn’t seem to fit either due to the lack of extended periods of mania. Just this daily, unpredictable and exhausting rollercoaster that raced through okay(ish) into sudden random peaks of unnatural highs and plunges into self-loathing, despair and crippling darkness. From laughter to sobs in a matter of hours, minutes, seconds.

In 2016, I rediscovered the discharge letter from the hospital in Berlin and I started wondering what this “Emotionally Unstable Personality” thing was about. When I started reading about BPD, it was like a cartoon lightbulb pinged into place. This made sense. This was me. The severe and rapid mood swings, the yawning sense of emptiness and loneliness. Clinging to certain people and idolising them. Feeling everything so intensely it hurt and the massive overreactions to the slightest trigger. The self-harm. The bursts of intense blazing anger I could only ever take out on myself. Jumping into different personas around people. Feeling totally shut down one minute but then flicking into almost manic talkativeness and laughter the next. Feeling sometimes that the world wasn’t real; that I was in a bubble that muted everything. Or that I wasn’t real. Not knowing who I was, not seeing anything clearly. The urges when driving to just slam into a tree or a wall. Spending too much and not caring. Desperately, desperately wanting to be liked and terrified of doing the wrong thing.

Feeling like life was nothing but a struggle and there would never be a place in it for me. That I was essentially a bad person, flawed beyond redemption, a failure of a human being – and it was my fault for not being “normal”. I had felt that way for so long.

Towards the end of 2016, I went into an appointment with my psychiatrist determined to ask the question. In all the time I had been under CMHT nothing had ever been said about it. So I just asked whether BPD was/had been one of my diagnoses. He hummed and hawed, talking about treating traits and not putting labels on people. But it became clear that I was indeed diagnosed with BPD; that he and my former psychologist had been waiting to refer me to treatment when I was ready. Or, more realistically perhaps, when the appropriate treatment was actually available.

It’s hard to remember exactly how I felt coming out of that appointment. Part of me was slightly dazed, I think. Being told you have a personality disorder will take anyone time to process. But mostly what I felt was relief. I was right, it was more than depression and anxiety. I had an answer. In that moment, in practical terms, that answer didn’t change anything. Yet, at the same time, it changed everything because now I had clarification. Now I had something to explain all the nebulous, confusing, distressing feelings and behaviours I’d had for so long. There was a reason for the crashes and the hurt and just nothing ever getting better. For feeling so difficult and so trapped. It had a name. And that name was Borderline Personality Disorder. I had Borderline Personality Disorder.

I was referred to a course of therapy specifically designed for BPD. It was tough, I can’t lie. I had to face up to a lot of hard truths from my past and go to places I had blocked for years. It’s been emotional, tumultuous, distressing.

I would do it all again.

Because it felt like waking up after years of being trapped in the same suffocating nightmare.

I’m starting to see me again. Or perhaps discover a me I never knew existed.

I still have times when the brakes on the rollercoaster fail and I race out of control. But I’m better at finding the emergency stop button before I spin off the rails completely.

I’m full of imperfections and pain and worries and struggles. I’m also full of empathy, understanding, intelligence, gentleness and wit. I’ve had to fight myself and the legacy others left me for most of my life. I used to think I was weak and broken. But now I know I’m strong. It doesn’t always feel that way, but I am. Otherwise, I wouldn’t still be here. I’ve made changes that have been so brutally hard but so necessary to try and build a life worth living.

And I’m doing it as me. Someone who’s awake, not stumbling through life in a false dreamworld. Or I’m getting there anyway.

I am not BPD. I’m not a label or a diagnosis. There is life beyond the borderline.

We are aware some of the content of this post may be distressing for readers.

If you have been impacted by what you have read or if you need to speak to someone, please reach out for relevant support:

  • Samaritans - 116 123 (freephone)
  • Breathing Space - 0800 83 85 87 (freephone)
Blog Author
RCPsych in Scotland

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